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M E


CHANTEL ANNA SMITH
20th June
Singapore Polytechnic - Accountancy
Age: 19 .

Married to: Terence Ong
On 26th Sept 2009

F A C E B O O K


Chantel Anna Smith
Chantel Anna Smith


W A N N A B E


Royal Princess
(i know i'm NAIVE ! =P)
Fashion Model
Air Stewardess
Fashionista
Interior/Graphic Designer
Ballroom dancer
Accountant

D R E A M S


Royal-Princess-like wedding proposal
Lounge-like home
Nissan Fairlady 350z and 370z
To be rich
Perfect features (physically)

W I S H E S


Apple MacBook Air
Class 3 Driving license
Apple IPOD
Fashion outfitsssss
Excellent Good grades
Get a car

T A G B O A R D



L I N K S


Tag Me To Be Link

- C L I C K . H E R E -

M E M O R I E S


March 2007
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January 2008
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November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009


C R E D I T S


Designer: Agnes
Base Code: Tammy
Image: Enakei
Image Host: Tinypic & Photobucket



Wednesday, December 09, 2009

MY . COMPLICATED . LIFE

Today is the 9th December 2009 .

Ever since that Zouk clubbing with forum friends, one of the guy has been treating me real nice . Yeah yeah, he likes me . Daily quotes to motivate me, good morning texts that i received on my phone even before i wake up, good night calls that i answered . He said my voice is his daily lullaby, says i'm pretty and always chat me up on MSN . He knew i'm married the second time we met, nevertheless, his heart tells him to do what he wants to make me happy .

I was at the esplanade library studying since 11am till 5pm . He came to the library with a muffin in his hands, wanted to surprise me . He came in, i was packing, ready to head off, didn't met him either . I only realized he's there to surprise me after i left and received the text . Head to level 1 and saw the balloon writing stuffs - write your wish on the balloon and they'll float them on the waterfront near the Merlion . I wrote my thoughts, stood up, and saw him sitting at the sofa behind me, waiting . I turned and walked away .

I freaked out .

Every girl wants to be well liked, guys holding flowers up to them . Who doesn't wanna be liked ? Today, romance caught up with me and gave me a pat on my shoulder . Until this day, i never thought romance is one thing i'll be afraid of . I always asked myself, where's my romance ? Why doesn't my husband send me 99 roses and bring me to high class restaurants for dinner ? All i get so far is a bouquet of 3 roses wrapped in paper with a stainless steel necklace for my birthday, or perhaps you wanna count in the lilies i held on my wedding day .

I realized i'm afraid of romance, so afraid i don't wish to ever receive it again . It's a direct link to the past i had . That past that had long been tattoo-ed down in my memory chart . I'd rather not have even one rose, than to have a normal bouquet of rose .

Being romantic, is horrible, because if you can't do it well, just scrap the idea, especially if you're someone without the romantic element in you . I don't know how i should put it in words to describe but i really seem scared of it .

Always remember this, especially my husband : for those things you wanna do for me, proposal or whatever date any surprise or whatsoever similar, please . . . if you can't do it 101% perfect, don't ever think about doing it . Perfect or nothing at all .

So back here about today, after i ran away, i splashed a chilling pail of water down his heart . I totally asked him to stop wasting his time on me . I had to . . . . and i felt totally guilty, for i am his first crush ever, he said i'm his first love, but i prefer it to be a crush .

I still am . . . guilty . Anyway, i know this post makes no sense at all, because i don't even know what i'm trying to write here .

For this guilt, i cleared an obstacle to save my marriage . How much test does god wants to put on me ? I tried hard, but they seem endless .



M Y . W O R L D . M Y . L I F E

8:35 PM



Tuesday, December 08, 2009

MY . COMPLICATED . LIFE

Today is 8th December 2009 .

Firstly, i really wanna thank all those who shown concern about my accident happening .

I'm gonna try and name all of you .

My younger sister, Sky, Adrian, Shirley, Martin, Royston, Patrick, Robin, Wei Hao, Kenni Tan, Vivian Ko, David Huang and not forgetting Koh Jin who called me and tried to ask about what happened . A few listed above are friends of my husband .

Risingixa, Rayky, Krked, Constanceling, Burntheplanes, Alinexx, larren, Alford, huii_89, whoozy and tapfer . These are all friends from forum that i went clubbing with that night . Despite the accident involves none of them at all, and that my husband is strongly against me clubbing with them ever again, they still showed concern .

Biggest thanks to my Er Jie for paying my medical fee .

Thank you, all of you . This is ever the first time i received many care and concern from the people around me . So i'm grateful, to everyone and anyone that made this possible, even so god may be on this list .

My parents are left unknown about this . I just hope everything will be back to normal as soon as possible .



M Y . W O R L D . M Y . L I F E

2:42 PM



Sunday, December 06, 2009

MY . COMPLICATED . LIFE

Today is the 6th December 2009 . And today, i learnt something, real and hard .

Went clubbing with forum group of friends last night at Zirca/Rebel/Lunar . A friend of mine drove me there, he's one of them clubbing too, but rest assured, he's married as well . I met him at 11.40pm and Bukit Gombak, but coincidentally, Kenneth called me at 11pm so i met him with JuanRu and Miguel before i head off .

Zirca was nice, except i was shivering like mad when i first entered, as usual . Gobbled down a glass of Tiger with straw and felt better . Head to Rebel and it was squeezy, though not as much as before, but still, it is . R&B makes me high with alcohol, so i stayed there for a while, but guys never fail to come near and hold my waist . So i went to the washroom to escape .

Er jie called me and said she's near by at Clinic bar so i head out to fetch her in . Locked her bag up and we entered the dancefloor . Guys . . . again . So i had enough and asked my sister to go lunar for her drink coupon claimed . After the drink, we returned to Rebel, and the guys is just so irritating, and we decided to head back to Zirca, more space, less crowd .

I lost my friends because they were so dispersed, so the two of us stood by the dancefloor and laugh out heads off at how people dance . Some shufflers are damn cool too . A guy approached my sister and asked us to join them at the table . Well, we were too bored to reject, and its still early, so we did . I'm sorry, my love, if you're angry at this . We had a few glass of martell and they were really strong, like they were trying to get us drunk, so i told my sister we try to drink lesser . 4.30am came and we decided to head home, the guys drove us home .

Half way, he drifted a couple of times, like showing off or something, with a stock lancer . And finally, he went 150km/hr and tried to overtake cars . Just so happen that that area, cars were kinda more than usual . Finally, he squeezed through and overtook 2 cars and bang, the car spin one round . Car stopped stationery in the opposite direction of the traffic flow . I asked my friend to start the engine and head off before TP comes, but engine is unable to start up .

I was at the front passenger seat, my left index finger got stuck in the gap between the door and the front cabinet, i couldn't cared much because i felt pain and pulled it out . The spin was so unexpected i hit my head hard on the back . Left door couldn't be open so i exit by the driver's door . Once out, i walked a few rounds and squat down by the first lane, looking out for taxi .

Caught one, flagged, it stopped and i told my friend goodbye . I stood by the taxi door and blurred, leaned against the door and fell, for a moment i couldn't stand up because standing up makes my visual and strength dropped to its lowest point . My friend held me up and ask if i was okay, he was saying a thousand times of sorry . I totally didn't wanna wait till TP comes or whatsoever . Up the taxi, i told him to drive me to the 24 hours clinic near my house that i know .

My finger is swelled up and numb, couldn't bend like normal . Doctor says i've got a blood clot at the back of my head for the hit . 3cm by 4cm big . My sister was fine, i'm glad for that . Doctor's fee came up to $91 bucks . And my sister paid for me .

Like, this is the last time i ever wanna be in another man's car .

I felt, disappointed, in myself, if i hadn't been greedy for the free transport home, nothing would have happened .

Came home at 6.45am, slept laying down on my right, because my left head hurts . My mom came into my room, and i tried to act as if nothing happened, because i wouldn't want her to be worried .

I thank god i'm of no serious injury, and i guess x-ray is not necessary even though i've got the referral letter .

At this point of time, i was dying to be with you, but i know it's not possible .



M Y . W O R L D . M Y . L I F E

12:49 PM



Friday, December 04, 2009

MY . COMPLICATED . LIFE

Today is the 4th December 2009 . Second post for the day and i'm so pissed .

Does it shake the world if i don't study for my test now ? Do you die if i fail my MST ?

Sometimes i just don't get it why people are so hardworking, well, maybe some are over thrown by the fact that people without high qualifications are being fired so they study like mad, like someone in my class .

Me, Tay Jie Min, does not wanna earn big bucks . Yes you got me, no big income amounts . I just wanna be able to live normally, eat and sleep enough, everything else the same, that is all .

First of all, i'm not a study freak, and i'm absolutely not of any single tiny bit of study material not my head my brain my breast my hands my fingers and not even my pussy . Get it ? So stop asking me to study study study and read stuffs on a Friday night when thousands are partying with beer out there .

Secondly, i admit i'm not doing what a student should be doing, but i'm just trying to be who i am . Clubbing is my hobby, and naturally weekends are the days i look forward to every week . Weekends are what keeps me going, so asking me to study on a Friday night is like asking a lion to drink milk .

Perhaps i have no rights to say this but it really annoys me when i see someone studying like a total chiongster like reading thick books from library about what we're studying and studying for test 2 weeks before the actual day . Those people who always pass exams with colourful rainbows coming outta exam hall whining and blabbling about oh they made a mistake and god there's just not enough time, and the classic line to say : '' ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ! . . i'm gonna fail ! '' . Please . . if you wanna complete the past year paper up to year 1800, keep it to yourselves .

Gosh, study freaks just pissed me off . But don't worry, if you know how to play after you study, hereby not means play games like board games and whatsoever children games, then you don't piss me off .



M Y . W O R L D . M Y . L I F E

9:43 PM





MY . COMPLICATED . LIFE

Today is the 4th December 2009 .

As i grow up and matures, the harsh reality of life is slowly falling into me . No doubt i'm still a young adult and below the lawful age of 21, recent happenings around me, and on me had made me consider and rethink about my actions .

One is getting a divorce, the other is married but relationship is going so weak, and another that is almost on the verge of a break up .

A sudden thought that i haven't been checkin on my husband's facebook made me did a logged in to his account . Ignored several stuffs while accepting some, i moved on to check his mail . Deleted some advertising mails and birthday reminders from Friendster . And an update from Friendster got me curious so i logged in his Friendster account too . Perhaps i was too sensitive . Went to his inbox and delete some expired mails as well as those getta-know-you mails he sent out to other girls and their replies .

Perhaps this is the way it should be, or it is meant to be, guys' way of thinking will forever not be in synchronize with those of girls' .

Guys think that girls can be bought or win over, with flowers, sweet talks and being nice to girls .
Guys think that saying a lie so that girls don't get hurt knowing the truth is okay .
Guys think that just looking at other pretty girls while with their girlfriends/wife is okay .

Of course, this doesn't apply to all guys, but nevertheless, it applies and is within most men, most hereby means greater or equals to 99% . Pardon me if my statistic is wrong, but based on experiences and recent happenings, this is what i can conclude .

Girls are only happy when they receive flowers and are treated nicely, because at the end of the story, sincerity is what they wanna see for future sake .
Girls rather get hurt knowing the truths, than to get hurt to a greater extent knowing their men lied to them . Truthful is utmost important .
Girls are sensitive, because we think about almost everything, especially during PMS . Looking at other girls whom are prettier by means she is not your everything - this is so simple .

No doubt that there'll be guys standing up objecting to those statements . One of the most common heard is to express being a gay if a guy doesn't look at pretty girls . I laughed at this, and i laughed hard . Scientific research shows that men and women have the same amount of sexual needs, only to the fact that women tends to hide them well . I read it from Discovery Channel Magazine or Reader's Digest i couldn't recall, but all i know is, if girls can give up looking at guys just because they have a partner, so can guys . Hide it well, do it secretly, as long as we girls don't catch you doing it, because believe it or not, even knowing the fact that our partners look at other pretty sexy girls, it hurts to the heart .

Some girls might think it's okay whatever the guy does, as long as he has them in his heart, they'll be contented . Well, i've been through those days as well, until the day my husband tidied his room and all those old school photographs or neoprints came out to sight . It does affect girls' heart, little or much, but still, shaken . Open minded girls wouldn't say much, but keeping it is indeed a sign that you still wanna remember that relationship or something like that . Correct me if i'm wrong, but as a girl, lady or some even address me as auntie, every tiny bit counts . And believe me, this kinda pinch hurt even more if what the men kept is a gift specially made from his ex-girlfriend or similar .

So much for girls versus guys .

All in all, relationships voice down to three main points - trust, truth and communication . Neither one should be neglected .

Still thinking about what to do tonight . . . boat quay ?



M Y . W O R L D . M Y . L I F E

6:15 PM



Thursday, December 03, 2009

MY . COMPLICATED . LIFE

Today is the 2nd December 2009 . As usual, has classes .

After class today, the graduation assembly was held at the convention centre . It was a total lame thing to do, i mean, nothing is really interesting during the programme and all the while i was listening to music on my new head phone . From 3pm to 5.30pm .

Then head to Bugis with Khng for the new Goldlion job and walked around after that, went Iluma too and saw the new KTV there by K-Box group . It's called Suites, some what like a premium karaoke bar, but of course, their private rooms and they're totally so cool and design fashion styles . Walked to Dhoby Ghaut then and bought Rochor famous soya drink and i took the bus home .

You called, almost without fail everyday . I can't help but realized i was expecting your call every single day, and almost every single evening . Today, you proposed another plan to get me over for Christmas for a week .

You being overseas for a year, i treat this totally as a test upon us . Though unsaid, it's clear that you still doesn't have the full trust in me yet . I ain't surprise, with the fact of my past and current doings . It applies to me too . Having seen so many or rather too many things around me, full trust in you is just near impossible . So your departure is like a muscle tear, painful at first, but bearing is one crucial part . Soon when its healing, germs will attack, if one is not determined enough, third party will gain advantage . We're having muscle tears; both of us, so this overseas thingy of yours, is to prove that i'm able to be faithful, changed from my past . To the least, that's my goal, about you, i shall not suppose anything . Hence, my dear husband, this Christmas, we shall be physically apart but emotionally together i hope .

I'm holding myself back to so much things, the wild side of my is breaking it's chains, i'm almost at the verge . It's you i'm holding back for, so don't let me down .

Ever since i passed my driving license, i've been desperate to drive on my own . Trust me, i'm really desperate . So i went online to check out on car rentals, which didn't turn out to be cheap . Then i turn to second hand cars, which made me sigh . A friend of mine text me today asking if i'm gonna buy a wrx or rex we call it which i posted on Facebook . I laughed of course, so i told him i'm longing to and he assured me he could help me find a good second hand rex because he's driving one and got lotsa friends driving that can help me with the buying . How i wish, really, it's like a dream to discuss about the car i'm gonna get, but it soon ended when i told him it's just another day dream of mine . He then brought me back to think of EG6 which i once thought of . It's really tempting . And i really begin to wonder . . .

That shall be my next goal .



M Y . W O R L D . M Y . L I F E

12:05 AM



Tuesday, December 01, 2009

MY . COMPLICATED . LIFE

Today is the 1st December 2009 . It's the month of Christmas, yet, my love it far from me .

Some expired photos .

Went Powerhouse the other day with Jason for a drink and my sister happened to be there too, so we clubbed together .

Sorry if i'm too ugly, that's why i'm trying to cover up my face .


Nah, just afraid that the camera flash might catch my red face because i'm drinking .


A bitchy face i've got, photo with my sister .


Yeah, so today was another day . Had three hours break and went Bugis with the clique . Poor Nathan got no seats on board the train so he was sitting by the door . Haha .


So then we went to a few places, and i decided to get myself a new ear phone because the current one is producing a sss sound whenever i play my MP3 . So i thought it's time to get it changed . Head to Iluma - Headphones Gallery to look for one with my budget of $30 . So then, i tried and tried and my budget moves from $30 to $50 to $80 . Finally, i bought one that cost $99, but the sales associate gave me a 10% discount . =)


Excellent bass with good quality sound, and louder, external noise 95% covered when songs are playing . GOOD !


Yeah, so much of me spending like an idiot . Had dinner with my parents and younger sis at New York New York the other day as my elder sister is the Assistant Manager at the outlet for the day . We had Yankee Burger to share, but if you think you alone can finish every bit of the huge burger, it's for free . =) . One of their promotions .


Had some pictures on my last day at work at Butterfly Park & Insect Kingdom at Sentosa .






Pheasant with damaged left leg . This pheasant would sometimes hop to me and make some funny noises in the throat, not the kind where by it showed that it dislike me, but somehow like trying to tell me something ? Yeah, always hope near me and stay for quite a while . =)



One of the mating position of butterflies .



This one is super weak when i found her, almost left with some last moments until some young stupid malay girls grabbing it from me and throw it in the air when it's already too weak to fly . It totally dropped to the floor and nowhere to be found ! Stupid malay ! So playful that she killed one poor butterfly . Not trying to be exaggerating here over a small life, but still it's a life .




Giant millipedes i have to catch everytime i work . And notice my thumb, index finger and middle finger, that's what happen when you catch a millipede when it doesn't want you to . . some stains they will have on their body, but then again, it's totally harmless .



Some rare species of butterflies .











Yeap, that's all for today, gonna turn in now . =) . Night people, night to the world, night to my lovely husband, night to myself hopefully .



M Y . W O R L D . M Y . L I F E

11:32 PM



Friday, November 27, 2009

MY . COMPLICATED . LIFE

Today is the 27th November 2009 . And i'm gonna blog whatever i have to blog, not all, but maybe 90% of them because my phone is piling up lotsa photos .

Yesterday in school, Nathan ordered a weird drink . Make a guess what drink is it in by looking at the following picture .


Isn't it nice ? But it tasted gross . It's actually Yakult or Vitagen ( Grape flavor ) with orange juice on the top . Lol . Yeah, smelt nice with the sweet grape smell but tasted like spoilt orange juice .

Then the other day, few of us caught Nathan's candid shots which is like quite rare case .




Those are shots which he tried to delete but too bad the phone is mine . Lol .

But of cause, i got my candid shot too .


That's for school . Last Saturday went Zouk with SGClub members and it was so crowded ! As if the world is squeezing into the dance floor .

I like the locker tag, it glows in the dark .





Saw that, just this picture above . How many pairs of hands can you count ? And that's just one part of the club . Lol, cause my phone camera is not wide enough to capture all .

So i played and gotta work right, if not where does the money come from ? Under my pillow ?

How many butterflies can you see ? =)


A newly hatched butterfly drying its wings .


Pupa - ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss .


And a butterfly resting .


And resting . . .


My favourite pet of all - the iguana . Her spine is broken because of some cruel Singaporean who tried to smuggle it in and kept as a pet without license . Poor iguana . I always sayang it and she loves it . =)



Oh and giant millipedes that i always have to catch .


Went to Dragonfly last night with Koh Jin . I gotta say, it's much more fun to club with him . Though sometimes i have to be alone and dance alone, but at least, no stranger guys come near me, and his guy friends don't dance with me either . Only Koh Jin and his girlfriends will dance with me sexay-ly .

Michelle and me .


Yeah, i wasn't high but it was just a little fun times .



What am i doing ?



Check it out ! I'm reading my 'hand'book ! And that's Charissa .



Charissa is very nice to me, though our age gap is hugeeeeeeee .


Performer .


Same performer .


Koh Jin and me .


Erm, my face is retard .


Koh Jin, me and Danyael .


Drinks, drinks, drinks . Martell, Hennessy, champagne and shots . We were drinking Martell with green tea, Hennessy with champagne . How scotching .


Me, KJ and Michelle .


Another Michelle and me . She's ten years older than me and still lookin hot .


See how they dance in front of me to make me dance . Lol .


The guys there took picture with me so that when Terence saw this, my clubbing days are over . So dear dear, when you see this, it's their prank okay ?


So much for trying to keep myself occupied when you're not around . I realized i can't stay at home because i'll think of all kinds of nonsensic stuffs, legal or illegal .

But when i stepped outta house, christmas lights are all over . Neither way i could go, club is still indeed the best for me to have a better time . I beg you, to stop thinking that i'll run away, because i promise i wouldn't . You already got my heart, you were standing outside, now you're inside, in the middle, seated in the one and only golden chair with the keys to every part of me . You're my master .




M Y . W O R L D . M Y . L I F E

4:46 PM